How to Have a First Conversation with Sugar Daddy: 10 Examples


Last Updated: April 29, 2024

Sugar Baby

Your first conversation with a sugar daddy can set the tone for your entire relationship. But don’t worry! With a little practice and some ideas about what to say, you’ll leave him feeling wild about your next encounter.

Use these 10 examples to make an instant connection, convey what you’re looking for by tactfully telling a sugar daddy what you want, and move things along with your sugar daddy!

1: Introduce yourself

Sugar daddies get a lot of messages from sugar babies, and not all of them are real people. So, many have become wary about what a sugar baby says to introduce herself. Talking immediately about what you can do for a sugar daddy and what benefits you expect will be an instant red flag for a sugar daddy.

It’s important, then, to introduce yourself as a real, genuine person. Try something like this,

“Hi, Dave, nice to virtually meet you! My name is Claire, I don’t live too far from you, I’m in Oak Ridge. I like to think of myself as something of a coffee connoisseur in case you ever need recommendations for our neck of the woods!”

2: Mention something interesting you noticed on their profile page

You’ll want to tailor your messages to the specific person you’re talking to. That’s because they’ll be able to tell if you’re using canned responses that you copied and pasted from your past conversations. And what a sugar daddy really wants is to feel special. The easiest way to accomplish that is to pick something from their profile and make conversation out of it!

“Sam, I can’t help but notice that one of your pictures is at a hockey game. I have to admit, I know nothing about hockey but I’ve always wanted to learn! It seems so fascinating.”

What we like about this example is that it shows that you don’t actually have to have common interests with a sugar daddy to make a connection. Even if you don’t know anything about their hobbies, turn it into an opportunity for them to teach you!

3: Ask them a fun ice-breaker question

If you’re struggling to find something on their profile to spark conversation, try an ice-breaker question instead. These are fun, low-stakes conversation starters, so resist the urge to ask anything too personal or serious. Try this out,

“What is your favorite breakfast food? Spare no details! I want everything from how you take your coffee to whether you prefer maple bacon to regular (or sausage links!)”

This question is fun because it could lead to conversations about the two of you going out to a luxurious brunch someday soon. Or, you never know, maybe one of you will treat the other to a homemade breakfast in the future.

4: Reveal something about yourself


Sometimes you have to be vulnerable to encourage a sugar daddy to open up. So, don’t shy away from talking a little bit about yourself. Keep in mind, though, that there’s a fine line between building a connection and oversharing. So stick with something light and fun, such as,

“So, something about me is that I know a little bit of French and I’ve been trying to build up the courage to order an entire meal in French at that new restaurant that opened up downtown.”

Look at that — you shared something vulnerable about yourself and gave your sugar daddy the opportunity to take you out on a date to said restaurant!

5: Be open to the possibility of meeting

Since this is your first conversation with a sugar daddy, you don’t want to be too forward about when you’re going to meet. That will come off as pushy. But, you do want to plant the seed that you’re open to meeting them. Here’s how you can play that card,

“These online conversations are always a bit awkward, aren’t they? It’s so hard to get a real sense of someone without interacting with them in person.”

If your sugar daddy isn’t ready to meet you yet, they won’t feel the pressure to ask you on a date. Instead, they may say something like, “Yeah, I agree. But it is nice to get to know someone a little better before meeting.” Or, they may take the opportunity to plan your first date. Either way, you’ve made sure to tell them you’re ready when they are.

6: Ask them what they’re looking for in a sugar partner

While you don’t want to be too forward in terms of benefits and agreements, it’s perfectly fine to get a sense of what a potential sugar daddy is looking for in a partner. In fact, if you ask the question the right way, they’ll probably end up telling you a lot of useful information about what kind of sugar relationship they’re looking for. Try saying something like,

“So, how would you describe your perfect sugar baby? Are there any characteristics that make you say, ‘Wow, I can’t wait to meet that person in real life!”

The sugar daddy may say something like, “I’m looking for someone who is fun and interesting. I’d really like a partner who is independent and busy doing her own thing because I don’t have a lot of extra time, myself.” This gives you a good sense that this sugar daddy wants something breezy and casual.

7: Ask about their sugar baby pet peeves


It’s always good to start with the positives, i.e. what they want in a sugar baby. But you can also ask them what they don’t like in a partner. Not only will this give you a better sense of who they are as a person, but you might also take notes about how to avoid pitfalls in your relationship. Here’s an idea of how to broach this subject,

“So, you’ve described your ideal sugar baby. But, what are some of the pet peeves you have about sugar dating? What are your red flags?”

It’s common for sugar daddy’s to respond to this question with answers like, “I don’t waste my time on people who are flakey or don’t respond” or “I hate it when my date spends the whole night on their phone.”

8: Give the conversation a clear conclusion

One thing that we would recommend is that you don’t spend too much time talking before meeting in person. That’s because chatting with someone online doesn’t guarantee that you’ll have chemistry in person. And lengthy conversations don’t always mean that you’ll be compensated for the emotional work of getting to know them. So, put a limit on your conversation, by saying something like,

“It was so great chatting with you. The time flew by! In fact, I just realized the time and I’ve got to [get back to work/take the dog out/get to bed].”

9: Don’t say goodbye until you have a plan to talk again or meet in person

Before you sign off, don’t miss the opportunity to keep the connection alive. You want to make sure that you’ll either talk again soon or that you’ll have your first date in the near future. So, before you say goodbye, make sure to ask them something like,

“What is your day like tomorrow? I’ve got a few things going on, but I would love to chat again if you’ve got some free time.”

This establishes that you’re willing to be proactive in the arrangement. By taking away any gray area, you can give your sugar daddy the green light to either keep talking or take the leap and ask you on a date.

10: Express your gratitude for meeting them!

Finally, you want to end your conversation on a high note. This is easily done with a little bit of gratitude! Not only will it set the tone for your next chat, but it will give your sugar daddy a little ego boost. And who can resist that? Here’s a great sign-off that you can use,

“Well, as much as I’ve enjoyed this, I’ve got to say goodbye! Thank you so much for responding to my message. You’ve totally made my day.”

With a heart-warming send-off like that, you can be sure he’ll remember you and be excited about talking to you again.

Now, it’s time to get chatting!

In this article, we’ve given you 10 tips for a wonderful first conversation with your sugar daddy. But, remember that you can let the conversation flow as you see fit. By being authentic and genuine, you’re bound to leave a lasting impression on your sugar daddy. Keep the conversation limited to a set time, stick mostly to positive topics, and be brave! Before you know it, your sugar daddy will be begging to meet this interesting person in real life! And that’s when the real fun begins!

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